Goofy to the Magic & Other Random Thoughts

Posted: May 24, 2012 in sports
Tags: ,

It’s time for more spring cleaning of the overcrowded sports mind.

• Normally the initial reaction to someone getting fired is to feel regret, but I’m happy for Otis Smith and Stan Van Gundy. Both were fired by the Orlando Magic this week, Smith after six years as general manager and Van Gundy five years as head coach. Both must feel relieved to get out from under the rule of an overgrown brat, Dwight Howard. Both Smith and Van Gundy have made enough money so they don’t have to worry about paying the rent. Both will land on their feet professionally, particularly Van Gundy who’s regarded as one of the top five or six coaches in the NBA. The question now is who will be the Howard’s next puppet? One shouldn’t be difficult to find with Disney World so close to Orlando. Wonder what Goofy is doing these days?

• The next time your buddy tells you about hitting a 300-yard drive, take him to the nearest tee box and give him a bucket of balls and tell him to show you. Men lie more about how far they hit golf balls than how long they last in the sack.

• I’ve always said the role of MLB managers is overrated, but if I bought a team I’d do my best to hire Tampa Bay’s Joe Madden. I like his only two rules: Be on time and run hard to first base every time.

• Don’t blame today’s pitchers for appearing to be so wimpy. Today’s pitchers are coddled and put on pitch counts not because they want to but because executives are trying to protect their outrageous investments.

• The NFL Players Association membership looks silly and foolish by balking because the league will insist players wear full pads starting with the 2013 season. In recent years most wide receiver and defensive backs quit wearing thigh and knee pads because it makes them appear tougher and look cooler. They claim the pads slow them down. That, of course, is ridiculous. And their argument is lame that the “pads rule” is the first step in altering their collective bargaining agreement. Grow up.

• The PGA Tour’s newest star, Jason Dufner, is so bland that it makes him colorful.

• The Jaguars hope quarterback Blaine Gabbert’s decision to cut his long, blonde hair has the reverse-Sampson affect and makes him tougher.

• An unreliable source in Gainesville recently told me Will Muschamp was seen smiling at a Hogtown mall. I’ll believe it when I see it for myself.

• Speaking of unreliable sources, take your pick among FSU President Eric Barron, Athletic Director Randy Spetman and football coach Jimbo Fisher.

 

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